?
Yes, I can live without you. Though some people say they can’t live without their special someone and that’s because their mind refuses to accept it. Yet, there is a kernel of truth to that cliché… to the “I can’t live without you” line.
If the person you think about everyday gets ripped away from your life completely, a part of you gets ripped away, a part of your heart, a part of your soul and a part of your future. The brain would try to compensate and rearrange a life which originally included that loved one in the majority of their daily life. To sleep and wake up knowing that you and I are in a relationship…it’s as easy as breathing. And just as easy to overlook. You only realize how painful it is to lose it once it’s gone. Again, just like air. If it’s there, you don’t notice it, but without it, it will kill you.
You are a big part of my life. My plans, my ideas, my thoughts of the future… they’re inevitably tied up with you. I can get frustrated with you, hate you and even try to ignore you. But eventually my thoughts go back to you. Sometimes I turn my brain upside down thinking how our personalities will really find its common ground, but I always go back to square one. There is no changing you, and there is no changing me.
So I am always tempted into thinking if both our lives are better off without each other. But then again, I love you. And I love you because I do. And no matter how much I don’t like you now, or didn’t like you then, or think I wouldn’t like you tomorrow, I still love you. If you stopped loving me, I will let you go. And I will try to forget you. But always, a part of me will be yours. And a part of me will love you regardless.
Without you, I wake up with no inspiration, no reason for living. And the heavy weight is unbearable. It’s like wishing my heart did not beat, or better yet, if I could literally pull it out stomp on it till it’s a heap of useless pulp. Like wishing I did not have to wake up at all. It is almost physically painful as it becomes difficult to breathe. And this will go on for about a 2 weeks. A couple of weeks wishing I were dead.
And no love of my family or money or food or friends can console me. It’s like being trapped within a suffocating and dense black vacuum, a situation where there is nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, no solace, no place where escape from the thought of my loss can go. There is no escaping one’s memories. It is then I can call myself the living dead. An animated, incoherent thing.
And after that week, there is emptiness, and numbing acceptance, and bitterness. But life will go on. Because there is no other choice but to move on.
I really cannot judge or blame people who become suicidal or allow themselves to fall into insanity. I do not condone it though. It is a sin and a waste. Period. But still, I understand the concept behind it. It takes tremendous amount of strength, will and time to recover from a broken heart. It is not an overstatement. Those who have truly been in love will agree with me.
Anyone who will say otherwise, has never truly loved deeply, without reserve, in full. And really, there is no better way to love than to love in full.
If the person you think about everyday gets ripped away from your life completely, a part of you gets ripped away, a part of your heart, a part of your soul and a part of your future. The brain would try to compensate and rearrange a life which originally included that loved one in the majority of their daily life. To sleep and wake up knowing that you and I are in a relationship…it’s as easy as breathing. And just as easy to overlook. You only realize how painful it is to lose it once it’s gone. Again, just like air. If it’s there, you don’t notice it, but without it, it will kill you.
You are a big part of my life. My plans, my ideas, my thoughts of the future… they’re inevitably tied up with you. I can get frustrated with you, hate you and even try to ignore you. But eventually my thoughts go back to you. Sometimes I turn my brain upside down thinking how our personalities will really find its common ground, but I always go back to square one. There is no changing you, and there is no changing me.
So I am always tempted into thinking if both our lives are better off without each other. But then again, I love you. And I love you because I do. And no matter how much I don’t like you now, or didn’t like you then, or think I wouldn’t like you tomorrow, I still love you. If you stopped loving me, I will let you go. And I will try to forget you. But always, a part of me will be yours. And a part of me will love you regardless.
Without you, I wake up with no inspiration, no reason for living. And the heavy weight is unbearable. It’s like wishing my heart did not beat, or better yet, if I could literally pull it out stomp on it till it’s a heap of useless pulp. Like wishing I did not have to wake up at all. It is almost physically painful as it becomes difficult to breathe. And this will go on for about a 2 weeks. A couple of weeks wishing I were dead.
And no love of my family or money or food or friends can console me. It’s like being trapped within a suffocating and dense black vacuum, a situation where there is nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, no solace, no place where escape from the thought of my loss can go. There is no escaping one’s memories. It is then I can call myself the living dead. An animated, incoherent thing.
And after that week, there is emptiness, and numbing acceptance, and bitterness. But life will go on. Because there is no other choice but to move on.
I really cannot judge or blame people who become suicidal or allow themselves to fall into insanity. I do not condone it though. It is a sin and a waste. Period. But still, I understand the concept behind it. It takes tremendous amount of strength, will and time to recover from a broken heart. It is not an overstatement. Those who have truly been in love will agree with me.
Anyone who will say otherwise, has never truly loved deeply, without reserve, in full. And really, there is no better way to love than to love in full.
posted by cryingintherain @ 6:39 PM
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